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I am going to wager that by you having come here that there is something that is troubling you or you feel that there is someone or a life that is better... waiting for you.

Now, I'm going to make it absolutely clear that this is not a professional counseling site, nor does it have expert opinions that many sites and forums contain.

This is just plain old me - having been through dozens of relationships and finally finding the right one, giving you my 2 cents worth.

I think you will find in my various 'ramblings' that there will be nuggets of truth in the sea of info. I do this because I feel that if I can make someone else's life see a turn around for the better - I would have washed away another stain from my tenure here on earth.

I wish you love and peace....

Monday, August 2, 2010

Time Factor in a Relationship

You have a perfect relationship. You are always together and comfortable with the arrangement. However time factor can become a pertinent issue of contest between partners. One man states that other than the school and work schedule, him and his partner do all other work together. He has to neglect his obligations because his partner gets upset if she has to timeshare with other hobbies, where as she gets all the time for her works when the guy is in school. 

This man hardly gets time for himself. Obviously the man will feel that his partner is being unfair. Thus, time factors should be dealt with early enough before it becomes a persistent problem.  

It should be realized first that both of you require time out for yourselves. Otherwise there will be some resentment which will result in argument and friction. Time factor is critical and any relationship that doesn’t allow that is going to disintegrate. Look at the broader picture with you partner and understand each other’s needs. There is nothing bad in wanting personal space.  

Communication must occur in a meaningful and loving manner. Make sure this discussion does not go the wrong way and yield negative result. Communication is the best solution to any problem. Bottled up anger will explode some day and disintegrate the relationship.  

While discussing time alone offer assurance to your partner. Emphasize on the time spent together and appreciate it as your best moments together. Quietly explain to your partner that if you spend time alone then the time spent together will be sweeter and something to look forward to. 

Tell her you genuinely miss her when you are away from her but you need the time alone to focus on yourself. Encourage her to take time out to focus on herself as well. Do be cautious while discussing time factor in relationship.  

Schedule your time alone to put the time factor in relationship to an end. Be realistic and establish a regular routine of time apart. It doesn’t matter what you do in this time alone. Whether it’s studying, perusing a hobby or running errands. Be confident and fearless. Remember it’s for the benefit of the relationship. 

Let your partner express her feelings if she is resisting the notion of time alone. There might be some underlying deeper issues at the bottom of her heart and that is why she doesn’t want you to go out of sight.  

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